This is an alert of the Child Sickness System. This is NOT a test.
Throw on your rain poncho and be prepared for overnight puking and waves of crying. Do NOT attempt to take Ambien to sleep, as you will be awakened multiple times by a puking child. Even your dog will puke in sympathy.
Sticky green boogers will be in abundance for the next 5-10 days. Imagination play will center around disease and medical treatment. Intermittent fevers will be spotted.
Check emergency supplies of Children's Ibuprofen, Children's Tylenol, 7Up, crackers and popsicles. Gigantic iced lattes from the expensive coffee stand down the street may be in order.
This concludes the alert of the Child Sickness System. God be with you.