Today in the Sunday School class that my husband and I are leading right now, we talked about the fear of not mattering. What a big topic! Not mattering to God, not being important to others, not recognizing our value as unique creations of God (essentially not mattering to ourselves).
We only got halfway through our planned questions, but it was a good thing because our discussion was really great. Almost everyone in the class participated and we really got to talking about important points.
What I got out of today's discussion is that while we may have head knowledge that we matter, we are important, we are loved, it is much more difficult to let that seep into our heart and really feel that value. That is a struggle for me at times. The better part of me knows I am God's child, but sometimes remembering that or really believing it is difficult. It's the kind of change that can't be found or instilled in a one hour group discussion. It will take lots of time in prayer, Bible study, reflection.
At first I felt like the connection between this week's chapter to the overall book theme of "fear" was pretty thin. At the surface, it seemed more about values and what we do to make ourselves feel important. But I see a connection to fear in that struggling with self worth is similar to struggling with fear in that we can't just decide, "Hey! I am not going to fear anymore! I'm not going to be controlling anymore!" likewise, "Today I am going to have self confidence! I decided that I am going to be important today!" It just doesn't happen that way.
If you are reading this and you struggle with these areas, you aren't alone! I know I'm not... I pray you will remember that God created you as a unique individual, created on purpose to glorify God. I hope you continue striving towards really feeling it!
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