Tonight, while Little Man patiently waited to ask me a question, Eric decided to tell me the story of how he came to own our manual can opener.
The story was so riveting, I suggested he blog about it. When he declined - he doesn't have a blog - I told him he should write a "guest blog" on my blog. He said, "I think you should tell the story for me. It is a weighty subject."
Ok, he didn't really say that last part.
Here is the story, as close as I can get to remembering what he said:
"Do you know the story of how I got this green handled can opener? My mom gave me this can opener right before I left for college..."
At this point I lost interest and stopped paying attention.
"And then I lived in an apartment at Valpo..."
Why did I suggest he should blog about this?
[Little Man interrupts and actually says, "Will you just stop talking now?"]
"And then I went to grad school at Valpo, but I accidentally left the can opener in my apartment. Maybe I knew someone who lived in the apartment? Or it was one of my friends? Or I went back there? So I went and asked them if they had a green handled can opener. And I found it in the drawer and was like, 'THIS. IS. MY. CAN. OPENER... and I'm going to take it!'" (Raises can opener in his fist triumphantly.) "And they were disappointed and like 'What just happened?'"
"And now we still have my can opener that my mom gave me when I went to college."
And now YOU know why Eric doesn't have a blog. And why he has sweatshirts that are half as old as he is. And why if something he owns breaks or wears out, he attempts to buy the exact same item.