Monday, November 9, 2009

Aliens: Don't Go There, Movie Makers

I am a pretty big fan of movies. Eric and I watch movies a lot and there are very few movies I have seen that I really disliked. I'm not even limited by genre, though horror is not a favorite and I'm sure I don't enjoy action flicks as much as my husband does. But, my movie viewing habits do have one serious limitation.

I cannot stand seeing aliens in movies.

Honestly, this preference runs strong enough that it probably borders on strange. Let's put it this way: If I loved aliens as much as I hate seeing aliens in movies, I would be attending conventions in some kind of stretch body suit with fake ears and painted green or purple skin.

I have instituted a "No Aliens" movie rule which is this: I will watch a movie with an alien plot, but only if the alien goes unseen for the entirety of the movie. This means any kind of alien movie has to be pre-screened by Eric who then tells me (99% of the time) not to even bother.  Even movies where the alien doesn't show up until the end get ruined as soon as I actually see the visual interpretation of the alien. I would much rather leave that up to my own imagination. And it is always, inevitably ruined by the cooky, "man dressed in Alien-wear with a mask" from back in the day or, more recently "totally ridiculous computer generated scary Alien".

There is only one exception I can think of to my "No Aliens" movie rule, and that is E.T. But, E.T. has the benefit of being connected to childhood memories. Plus, who can say no to cute little E.T. hiding out in the closet of stuffed animals??

I am writing about this today because yesterday I saw Alien (1979) for the very first time. I thought that maybe I had actually found a movie that wasn't ruined for me by the actual appearance of the alien! I actually told Eric during the movie that I think my brain was responding to the Alien more as a "monster" (which I have no problem with) than as "alien". You know, it's all drooly with the extra sets of teeth, busting out of some guy's chest, shreiking and flailing around. Really, more of a horror movie than an alien movie. I made it all the way to within the closing minutes of the movie, impressed with how current the alien looks considering the movie is now 30 years old. And then what happens? I won't ruin it in case anyone reads this who hasn't seen the film. Let's just say the final confrontation occurs and all of the sudden there is a cut to a wide shot of...person dressed in dark clothes with an alien mask/helmet and extra fake limbs attached to his body. What a bummer.

All I could say to Eric was, "And now... the line has been crossed for me." I was done, but the movie was also over.

I can't think of another movie rule I have that is as 100% true for me as this one, or one that I feel so strongly about. Please, no alien related movies for Christmas! =)

1 comment:

  1. You're hilarious! E.T. actually gave me nightmares as a kid (he chased me through a grocery store and kept telescoping his head up above the aisles to find me). I never got over that. I hate E.T. I have since forgiven Steven Spielberg, however. And I like the Alien movies. Maybe because I was older than 5 when I saw them.